True (5 minute Friday)

True: posted onto Five Minute Friday

The truth is that in high school I weighed 50 lbs more than I do now.  After time, I had just gained weight.  Working a lot, studying alot and not exercising, plus I like cookies. So sue me.  After high school, I started exercising a little at the gym and eating better and wow, the weight fell off in like 3 months.  It was crazy. I have always been on the “need to lose weight” side in my book.  Even in college, when I was healthy and fit, I still felt like I needed to be thinner.  So lame.  I wish that I could see myself in an honest light, instead of the insecure teenager.  Sometimes I do, when I have the just right outfit or my hair is working or I get a friendly compliment.  But I have learned to be happy with me.  This overweight stage of my life helped me to gain a personality.  I wasn't confident in my looks, so I was funny and happy.  My personality has stayed pretty similar to my high school self, I think.  Maybe?  But I am at a good place now physically and that makes me feel good.  But what makes me feel GREAT is knowing that I am someone in spite of what I weigh or what I look like.  And that is my favorite lesson to teach my kids.  Sure, it’s great to be all prettied up and feel nice on the outside, but the inside is what lasts for a long time, forever in fact.    When I die, I hope my people won’t say, “Man, she was hot, but she was really mean.”  Or “She had a pretty face.” Or “She really knew how to put an outfit together.” I hope they will say, “She helped people.” “She was a good wife and mother.”  “She loves people and life.”  So, high school self, you can hit the road because I am not being dragged down by your insecurities anymore. And yes, I will keep the personality, thank you very much.